


Reach For You

by Janie94



Series: Still Healing [3]
Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alpha!Marco, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Complicated Relationships, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Infertility, M/M, Mating Bites, Mating Bond, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Omega!Mario, Omega!Robert, Past Rape/Non-con, Polyamory, Possessive Behavior, alpha!thomas, past Robert Lewandowski/Marco Reus, past Thomas Müller/Marco Reus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-26
Updated: 2017-06-12
Packaged: 2018-09-27 02:32:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9946286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Janie94/pseuds/Janie94
Summary: Thomas and Robert are still struggling to adjust to the changes in their relationship while Marco and Mario are trying to find their way back together. But it seems that the four of them are unable to stay away from each other and slowly they begin to realize that perhaps they need each other to start solving this mess together...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If you haven't read the first two parts of this series ('Breathe Into Me' and 'Feel Your Echoes'), please don't read further and start with these two.
> 
> A familiar scenario: I have no time at all for writing this story because of my endless To Do list, but I just can't help it, this story wants to be told. This series may be the most complicated thing I have ever written and it has changed very much from my initial vision (to the better I think). Now that I have started this third part which I have been so excited for ever since plotting the story, I'm very, very nervous about your reactions.
> 
> The first chapter will only be a flashback of Robert and Marco again, but I very much enjoyed writing it and it will shed some light on Robert's behavior in the next chapter(s). Besides, I enjoy writing about these very much. ;)
> 
> Please let me know what you think about it, I need your visible support to keep myself motivated.

 

 

**Reach For You**

 

**Chapter 1**

 

_It is the fifth day of Robert's heat and it has definitely reached its peak._

_The only reason that he is not in his bedroom but sitting at the table right now is because his Alpha ordered him to._

_Robert's body is trembling with the effort to stay where he is instead of rounding the table and kiss the Alpha who is here with him; who he hopes will become his mate one day._

_He takes in the details of his face, the slight stubble, the messy blond hair, his amused amber-green eyes. Robert is just about able to keep his needy moan inside, but his body still betrays him and the smell of his sweet slick intensifies._

_Marco's lips quirk upwards knowingly. “I can smell your arousal.”_

“ _I need you, Marco, please take me,” Robert begs and it doesn't even cross his mind that he has gone from fearing all Alphas to begging for one's knot in a matter of days._

“ _Only when you have eaten more,” Marco argues. “Eating and drinking is very important in your current state and I wouldn't be a very good Alpha if I neglected these things. You don't want me to feel like a bad Alpha, do you?”_

_Robert knows that Marco is playing him and his damn Omega instincts, but he still can't help it. He returns his attention to his food and eats some more, occasionally taking a sip from the glass of orange juice in front of him._

_Half an hour later Marco has finally deemed it enough for a few more hours and he has barely finished speaking when Robert has already thrown himself into the Alpha's arms, his hands clutching needingly at the naked body. Marco has given up dressing himself on day three of Robert's heat when the Omega went from taking his clothes off to tearing them to shreds. Not that Robert minds seeing Marco walking around his house in all his naked glory..._

“ _Slow down, Robert,” Marco tells him with an amused laugh but it's clear that he doesn't actually expect the Omega to obey. Robert is convinced he wouldn't have been able to even if Marco ordered him. His body is hurting again, aching for the Alpha and he pulls Marco into his bedroom and almost violently throws him onto the covers._

_Marco shudders in excitement, something he does every time Robert takes charge of the situation and his reactions have encouraged the Omega to do that more often._

“ _Kiss me,” Robert orders in a low voice and a moment later Marco's mouth is on his own, their lips parting to let the other one in while Robert climbs on top of the Alpha to press him more firmly into the sheets. His already hard erection rubs against Marco's growing arousal in an unmistakable manner and Marco chuckles against his lips. “Come on, Robert, take what you need.”_

_Marco may have uttered these words just to tease him, but Robert is far too gone and out of his mind with want and desire to care. The blond's eyes widen in surprise and he moans loudly when Robert wraps his hand around the younger man's cock and sits up, bringing himself into a position where the tip of Marco's cock is pressing lightly against his entrance. Then he lowers himself down, finally feeling the younger man's cock sinking into his body and soothing his painful ache._

_There Robert stills even though everything in him is screaming at him to take all that Marco is offering. But under all his desire Robert has actual feelings for the other man and he wants – no, he needs – Marco to acknowledge that he's feeling the same. That this is about more than an Alpha helping an Omega through his heat._

“ _And what do_ you _want, Marco?”_

_The Alpha stills for a moment as he thinks about it and slowly his eyes turn from amber to red. “I want you. Not just your body, I want more. I want everything you will offer me.”_

_So this is it, the moment of truth. “And if I offered you my heart?”_

_Marco looks surprised. “What does that mean?”_

_Robert hesitates for a moment. If he asks Marco to take him as his lover now, he will never know if the Alpha truly wants to be with him or if the Alpha merely wants to protect him. No, now is not the right time for this kind of talk, this has to wait until they are both completely themselves again._

“ _I told you you're the only Alpha that I want,” he says eventually. “I don't want us to go back to being friends, not after what we shared during my heat.”_

_Marco growls possessively. “I will never be able to see you as anything but my Omega again, Robert. Not after what you told me and especially not after a week full of lovemaking.”_

_His choice of words surprise Robert and he feels a pleased warmth growing in his chest at the confirmation that this is truly more than just sex between them. “One day I may find a mate,” he muses. “Until then you will be my only Alpha and nothing's going to change that.”_

_He has barely finished his sentence when Marco has quickly turned them around, so Robert is lying underneath him and the Omega gasps as Marco sinks even deeper into him. “You're mine, Robert.” The older man's heart skips a beat at these words, but then Marco adds in the same determent tone, “You're mine to protect.”_

_Of course. Marco wants to protect him. Something that Robert should have anticipated when he told Marco about his dark past. Robert tries to squish down his disappointment and stay hopeful because this is a good thing, right? He is the only person Marco made such a promise to and it could very well evolve into something more._

“ _Yes, Mars, I'm yours,” he agrees softly and no sooner has he said those words, the Alpha above him starts to move._

_Robert gasps and he tries to meet the heated gaze from the glowing red eyes above him while pleasure is coursing through his body, amplified by his heat._

“ _Yours,” he repeats and Marco moans above him, leaning down to bury his face in the crook of Robert's throat, his thrusts speeding up and becoming more desperate as he is now seeking to find his own release as well._

“ _All yours,” Robert manages to whisper one last time before Marco bites down lightly on his skin and Robert's vision turns white as he comes hard over their stomachs._

_He is distantly aware of Marco's groan and Robert knows that the Alpha is close as well. Robert feels a dull pain where Marco bit him, but he knows it's not what he truly wanted, a mating bite._

_Still, it is the visible claim of Marco, a mark that will stay for a few days and show everybody that Robert isn't free anymore, that he belongs to another. And it is enough to send Robert's mind overdrive. He lets out a pleased growl and hooks his ankles behind Marco's back, causing the Alpha to sink so deep into him that he is buried to the hilt._

“ _Robert!” Marco cries out as he reaches the edge of the cliff._

“ _Fill me with your seed, make me yours!” Robert utters not for the first time in the last few days, but it is the next plea that shocks him as much as it must shock Marco. “Knock me up, Mars! Want to have your kids.”_

_And with a strangled cry Marco finally comes inside of him, his knot filling the desperate Omega and making him feel whole again._

_They are both staring at each other with wide eyes when Marco eventually breaks it, he sounds almost scared. “This was just your heat talking, right?”_

_Robert nods instantly. “It must be. Male Omegas can only get pregnant during heats, right? It would make sense that they would beg an Alpha for it during their heat.” He chuckles to hide his panic. “I mean, I know that I don't want kids yet. Maybe someday after my football career is over. And only with my mate.”_

_Marco looks relieved. “Good. For a moment I thought you were being serious.” He frowns. “You're still taking the pill, aren't you?”  
Robert rolls his eyes. “Yes, since the first day of my heat as you very well know considering you were the one insisting on them before before you would take me. So no need to worry about an accidental pregnancy.” _

“ _Sorry for asking, I'm just worried about the consequences,” Marco admits with a nervous smile. “I'm not used to feeling so protective about somebody and I don't know any longer if what I am feeling is real or just my instincts messing with me.”_

“ _And what are you feeling?” Robert asks, unsure what to expect._

_Carefully Marco turns them until they are lying side by side and Robert winces as he feels the Alpha's cock shift inside of him. The blond bites his lip and raises his hand to touch the mark he left on Robert's throat. “I'm not sure. All I know is that I consider you mine for now.”_

“ _Yours to protect,” Robert adds almost questioningly, remembering Marco's earlier words. “Or also yours for the taking?”_

_Marco's eyes darken with desire and Robert could swear he can feel the Alpha's cock in him hardening again. The Alpha leans forward and kisses Robert hungrily, but with a deeper lying tenderness that answers that question better than words probably could at this point. Marco may not know yet how deep his feelings for Robert go, but they are definitely there. And for now that's enough for Robert._

_He lets out a content sigh as he begins kissing him back, tilting his head slightly as he slides his tongue into Marco's mouth. They take their time with kissing each other and it takes a while until eventually Marco breaks the silence again. “My knot has subsided, I should pull out now.”_

_He moves to do exactly that, but Robert lets out a disapproving snarl and tightens his grip on the Alpha. “No, I want you to stay inside of me. Please.”_

“ _It will start to hurt you soon,” Marco remarks halfheartedly though the glint in his eyes tells Robert that he likes the thought of staying inside of the Omega for longer than what is usual._

“ _It won't be painful, not when I'm in heat,” Robert argues._

_Marco nods and pulls Robert closer instead of separating their bodies like the voice of reason is perhaps telling him to. The Alpha starts slowly licking over the superficial wound he left on the Omega and Robert's eyes close at how good it feels._

_With a sigh he lets his head drop back into the pillow and Marco follows the movement to keep licking the mark like a proud lion caring for his mate._

_Once again Robert feels longing at the thought of him and Marco becoming mates one day and he raises his hand to the back of the Alpha's head, pushing his face harder against his throat until the Alpha gets the hint and bites down again._

_Hot pleasure courses through Robert again, but he still feels disappointment that the Alpha didn't bite deep enough for what he truly wants. He shoves the bitter thought away and concentrates on his growing desire, his hand staying at Marco's head to keep him in place. But the Alpha seems to have no intention of stopping what he's currently doing, alternating between licking and sucking at the bruise; between soothing and deepening the pleasant pain._

_Robert is becoming hard again from these actions, but at the moment he barely cares about it, only wanting to feel Marco deepening his claim. The Alpha seems to find the action just as arousing though and Robert tenses slightly at the unfamiliar feeling of Marco's cock becoming hard inside of him._

“ _Marco, move,” Robert orders in a barely audible voice and the younger man obeys immediately, starting with slow and shallow thrusts that are merely meant to tease the Omega._

_Robert hisses in frustration and he tightens his hold on Marco's neck while at the same time loosening his ankles to give the Alpha more room to move.  
“Harder,” he orders and he can feel Marco chuckling against his skin before his pushes into him with increasing force, finally easing a bit of Robert's painful want. “Not into foreplay, hm?” Marco teases him. “You really want me to knock you up, do you?” _

_Robert growls and even though the rational part of his brain knows that Marco doesn't mean it and Robert can't get pregnant with the pills he has been taking the past few days, his instinct is too strong. “Yes, please,” he replies and raises his hips to meet the Alpha's thrusts._

_Marco gasps at the unexpected movement and his next push finally goes deeper again, hitting Robert's prostate and drawing another groan from the Pole._

“ _Want me to claim you again?” Marco manages to ask, but Robert has enough of the blond's frustrating teasing. Instead of replying he grabs Marco by the hair and pulls him away from his throat, his mouth closing around the Alpha's neck and sucking the skin between his lips._

_Marco cries out as he comes again, claiming the Omega and his knot joining their bodies for the second time today. Robert smiles against Marco's neck as he follows him over the edge._

_When he is able to form coherent thoughts again, he is the one holding Marco who is still breathing hard from the force of his orgasm. “This knocking you up thing is really turning you on, isn't it?”_

_Robert is just as surprised. “It seems we have discovered a hidden kink of mine.”_

“ _Well, if it always makes you this bossy, then I will tease you with that more often,” Marco replies with a smug grin._

“ _I would be much more grateful if you actually did it instead of teasing me,” Robert retorts in a playful voice, giving Marco the possibility to either take these words seriously or as a joke._

_The blond takes the latter option. “Of course. How many kids do you want?”_

_Despite his slight disappointment Robert can't help but smile and shove against the Alpha's chest though it only makes them both wince as they are still joined. “You're an idiot.”_

_Marco laughs softly before pulling Robert into his arms again. The Omega closes his eyes again, the thought of him and Marco becoming mates and later parents following him as he falls asleep in the Alpha's embrace while they are both still connected by Marco's knot..._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those you who haven't seen the update to my profile yet, I'd just like to tell you that there won't be as many regular updates as in the previous months, especially regarding this story.  
> I wanted to stop writing stories for a while, but as it seems I am unable to stay away from them completely and so this chapter happened. A lot of credit to the return of my inspiration goes to my best friend Kathrin (maybe you will join AO3 and read this note one day) and the lovely Stewolf. Their kind words encouraged me to keep on writing and I will be forever grateful to them. :*
> 
> Do you guys still remember that scene from 'Breathe Into Me' when Robert told Marco about his infidelity? I can't believe that I've only written it half a year ago, it feels so much longer to me. Anyway, this chapter here will give you details of the talk with the doctor that Robert was talking about and perhaps give you an even better understanding of Robert's emotional reaction when Marco brought up the topic of having kids...

 

**  
Chapter 2**

 

_Usually Robert avoids going to the doctor unless he is due for a regular medical check for his team. And when he does, he takes a double dose of suppressants to make sure that his results fit the norm of a Beta. But when he wakes up the morning before their return game against Benfica Lissabon, he knows that something is definitely wrong with his body._

_He feels nauseous, his lower body aching as though he is going into heat. Only that he doesn’t. The signs are there, but Robert just doesn’t reach that point where pain becomes lust and he usually begins to feel too hot. There is no sweet scent of an Omega ready to be knotted filling the room and he is deeply grateful for it. He couldn’t afford this, least of all now when they have so many important games ahead. But still, there is that lingering feeling that something is deeply wrong. His suppressants are supposed to keep all Omega symptoms in check. Maybe they are starting to wear off because he has been taking them for six years now? Perhaps he should switch to different, maybe even stronger ones?_

_Questions that only a doctor can answer him. And it can’t be their team physician Volker for obvious reasons. If he found out that Robert is an Omega, he would have to make a lot of adjustments to so many things in training or Robert’s personal diet plan and that would for sure draw the attention of the team._

_No, it has to be someone else. And that’s how Robert ends up in the office of Bayern’s former physician Dr. Müller-Wohlfahrt, arguably one of the best doctors in Germany. And most importantly someone who won’t tell the team about Robert’s secret, not after his fallout with Pep Guardiola._

“ _Robert, what an unexpected surprise,” the Beta greets him with a firm handshake. “Come in and take a seat.”_

_Robert obeys nervously and as soon as the doctor has joined him, he starts explaining the whole story starting with him taking suppressants and ending with his symptoms from this morning._

_Dr. Müller-Wohlfahrt listens to him intently without interrupting him once and when Robert has come to an end, he doesn’t even look surprised. Instead he leans forward with a sigh. “To tell you the truth, I already suspected that you were taking suppressants. Your results in the test were too alike as though they had been manipulated. There was never a swing into either direction, not when you had just done the most straining exercises, not after your few weeks off during summer break and not even when I had just give you medications that should definitely have some kind of impact on the blood exam of a proper Beta.”_

_Robert stares at the doctor for a long moment, unsure how to feel. “You knew that I was an Omega? Why didn’t you tell Bayern’s management or at least the coach about it?”_

_Dr. Müller-Wohlfahrt snorts. “Oh please, do you really think that Pep would have altered your training plan because of this? That he would have been alright with his best striker missing training or matches because of regularly going into heat. I don’t think so. I bet he would have encouraged you to keep on taking those damn suppressants, so it wouldn’t have made much of a difference if I had told him.” His stern look becomes a bit gentler. “Besides, I’m sure you had your reasons for wanting to hide your true nature and as long as this secret didn’t interfere with your career or your performance, I didn’t see any necessity for a breach of my medical confidentiality.”_

_Robert feels almost touched by this confession, but before he can say anything, the Beta has already got up from his seat and points to the treatment table in the corner. “I have a suspicion of what is wrong with you, but I have to get confirmation first. Please take off your jeans and underwear and lie down on the table.”_

_Robert obeys silently, his anxiousness from earlier returning as he undresses and then lies down on his back._

“ _Have you taken your suppressants this morning already?”_

“ _Not yet,” he replies. “I didn’t want them to mess with your diagnosis.”_

“ _Good,” Dr. Müller-Wohlfahrt says before reaching to the small table beside him. “I will now give you a shot of concentrated Omega pheromones to test your body’s reactions.”_

_Robert nods and keeps still when the needle pierces his skin and the liquid is entering his system. The pain intensifies, concentrating in his groin with a burning like it used to do during the peak of his heat. Only that there is no pleasure intermingled with it, Robert doesn’t even get aroused or feel the need to jerk off._

_He flinches when he feels the doctor fingers carefully probing his entrance, but stays still though he can’t hide a pained wince when the Beta forces two fingers into him without warning._

_Dr. Müller-Wohlfahrt lets out a tired sigh before he pulls his fingers out again and leans back so Robert can look at him.  
“I’m afraid my suspicion has turned out to be right. Your body desperately wants to go into heat, but it can’t any longer. I have had such a case before, but yours is a bit more drastic. The Omega I treated told me he had a very bad heat despite his suppressants little more than a year before this here happened to him. It’s a bit strange that your body didn’t give you this kind of warning sign before.”_

_Robert’s blood runs cold as he remembers his heat from two years ago. “I have also had one when I was still playing for Borussia Dortmund. I thought my suppressants had just failed, it didn’t occur to me that it may be that bad.”_

“ _And you spent that time on your own? Or did you let a Beta or another Omega help you through it?”_

_Robert is a bit confused that the doctor didn’t go for the most obvious conclusion. “No, I spent it with an Alpha.”_

_The doctor frowns. “I thought that Alphas are driven by their instinct to fill an Omega up and claim them when they are in heat? That it is always the Omega who has to take pills for protection because Alphas hate to feel a barrier between them and their Omega?”_

_Robert blushes at the direct words while also feeling irritated by these questions. Of course he knows how Alphas are and the obvious conclusion should be that the Alpha took him without protection. If Marco had caught something, his natural instinct to protect Robert would have made him stop and consider using a condom. So what does this have to do Robert’s problem now?_

“ _We didn’t use protection. But I fail to see how this is relevant now.”_

_The doctor stares at him disbelievingly for a very long moment. “I thought you had sex with a male Alpha, not a female. Correct me if I got it wrong.”_

“ _No, you got it right,” Robert responds and he has no idea how to feel anymore._

_The Beta frowns even more at his reply. “You spent your heat two years ago with a male Alpha. And he penetrated you without using a condom.”_

_Robert’s blush deepens but he nods._

“ _Did you use pills for protection?”_

_It takes Robert quite some effort to hide his annoyance. “No, of course I didn’t. I just told you I was taking suppressants at that time. The heat came totally unexpected and I didn’t plan on letting an Alpha take me.”_

_Why does the Beta keep looking at him with this unsettling grave expression?_

“ _So I guess you resumed taking your suppressants instantly after the heat was over?” He sounds like he wants Robert to deny it._

“ _Yes, I did. Spending the heat with this Alpha had been wonderful and I considered not taking the suppressants any longer, but I was under the illusion that he would mate me. A few day after my heat came to an end we had a fallout and he told me that he didn’t intend to mate me or anybody else for that matter. That he didn’t want to bind himself to me for the rest of his life. I resumed taking the suppressants the day after.”_

_The Beta now looks even more upset than before. “Robert, you really should have visited a doctor when your body forced you into such a heat. There was a reason why it reminded you that you’re an Omega and not the Beta you would like people to believe you are.” He leans forward and places his hand over Robert’s in a calming gesture. “Your body did the only possible thing to make you accept your Omega nature. It drove you to have sex with an Alpha multiple times.”_

“ _I don’t understand what you’re saying,” Robert admits though he has the feeling it is something bad._

“ _The only way every sane Omega would have to embrace his nature is if he got pregnant.”_

_Robert’s eyes widen when he finally realizes what the doctor is trying to tell him. “Hold on, you want to tell me that I was pregnant?” He is jumping up from the table in an instant, aware that he is overreacting, but not caring at all. “This is ridiculous. I would have known if I was pregnant.”_

“ _Robert, please sit down and listen to me carefully,” the doctor says with urgency and after a long moment Robert obeys without a word, fighting against the turmoil inside of him because of the doctor’s unfounded words._

“ _The suppressants do exactly what the name says, they suppress your Omega nature. That does not only include your scent or your heats but also your ability to bear a child. A male Beta can’t do that and when you started taking the suppressants again, you couldn’t either.”_

_Robert just stares at the older man for an endless amount of time, trying to comprehend what he just told him. “I was-“_

_He breaks off, not wanting to say it out loud, but he needs to have confirmation. “I was pregnant with Marco’s child? And I unconsciously aborted it when I started to take my suppressants again?”_

_The doctor looks at him sympathetically. “That’s a rather drastic way to put it but yes, you might say that.”_

_For what must be several minutes Robert doesn’t move at all, feeling numb and hollow inside._

_He was pregnant. Marco knocked him up. They were supposed to become fathers. They were supposed to have a child together. A child. Fathers. Together._

_And Robert ruined everything._

_He lays his palm over his lower stomach, noting its flatness and the hard muscles underneath where there should have been a tiny being for a few months of his life. For a few days Robert carried Marco’s child inside of him._

_Every doctor would most likely argue that it wasn’t a child yet. Not even an embryo, just a tiny little zygote. But that doesn’t change anything for Robert. He was supposed to give birth to Marco’s child._

_His fingers curl and he digs his nails into the skin covering his abdomen until it hurts, but it is nothing compared to the pain in his heart. If he hadn’t been ignoring his symptoms so carelessly, he would have a one and a half year old baby on his arm right now. His baby. Marco’s baby. Their baby._

“ _Robert?”_

_His eyes try to focus on the man in front of him, but his sight is blurred. It takes him a while to realize the reason for it: He is crying._

_The doctor hands him a tissue and Robert wipes his eyes, but the tears just won’t stop._

“ _Robert, there is more that I need to tell you. Do you think you can take it or do you want to go home and sleep a few nights over this?”_

“ _No, just tell me now” he rasps in a trembling voice. He knows time wouldn’t make it better and it can’t be worse than what he already heard._

_He was wrong._

“ _Your body tried to force another heat on you, that’s why you felt so bad this morning. But it can’t. The injection of the Omega pheromones was supposed to drive you crazy with lust and should have prompted your body to produce as much as slick as when you’re at the peak of your heat. Yet it didn’t. I’m afraid you have been taking the suppressants for too long and another pregnancy won’t be possible for you.”_

_Robert freezes, his insides clenching at Dr. Müller-Wohlfahrt’s words. “What do you mean it won’t be possible? If I stop taking those stupid pills, I will go back to being an Omega. Just like last time.”_

“ _The injection has shown close to no reaction from your body even though it clearly wants to go into heat. Even though you didn’t take your suppressants today. That’s a clear sign. Of course I will take some blood samples from you and send them to the laboratory so we get confirmation. But I’m certain the outcome will be the same. You’re infertile, Robert.”_

_His memory of what happened after that crushing revelation is only hazy. He remembers the doctor taking blood from him. He remembers that the doctor tried comforting him with useless words, as did the doctor’s assistant who led him out of the room. He doesn’t remember how he got home, only that he wasn’t the one driving. Perhaps they called a taxi. He doesn’t remember. He doesn’t care._

_When he is eventually standing in his house and shutting the door behind himself, shutting the cruel world out for the time being, he heads for the bathroom and the next minute he’s kneeling in front of the toilet and vomiting._

_After he has thrown up the contents of his stomach and his following dry heaves have subsided, he just remains sitting on the cold tiles of the floor for a while._

_He doesn’t know if he is still crying from the devastating news or if_ _his eyes_ _are merely watering because he has just thrown up. Not that it makes much of a difference. He just wants to stay here and not have to face the world, the_ _bitter_ _truth._

_All his dreams have been crushed to pieces and he only has himself to blame. Building a family, giving birth to two or three children, having a supportive mate at his side. He could have had it all._

_For so many years he has despised being a needy, weak Omega, but with his attempt to hide his nature, he is only made it worse. Now he is not even a proper Omega anymore. He is nothing. Useless. A failure._

_His thoughts spiral further down for almost an hour until he finally finds the strength to_ _pull out his phone and calls up Marco’s contact, his finger_ _hesitantly_ _hovering over the call symbol._

_He wants to call the Alpha so badly. To hear his voice, to hear him say that he still loves Robert even though the Omega failed him. But what is he supposed to tell him?_

‘ _Hey, Marco, I just found out that I was pregnant with your child and my own cowardice is what killed it.’_

_No, he can’t tell Marco about this. Not now, not ever._

_Instead he calls his coach and asks him not to let him start tonight. Robert wouldn’t be much help to his team in his current state. Pep accepts it under the condition that Robert will be available on the bench in case he is needed. The Omega is too exhausted to argue and just ends the call then._

_He doesn’t even bother to undress as he lies down on his bed and curls into himself,_ _letting the pain and sorrow crush him. It takes him several hours to fall asleep and when he finally does, both of his hands are clutching his lower abdomen tightly as though he could still feel his and Marco's child within him..._

 

“Congratulations, Mr. Götze. You are pregnant.”

Robert hears these words, but he can't truly comprehend them. Mario is pregnant?!

He stares at the doctor, waiting for some kind of explanation, but of course it doesn't come. Because there is only one possible explanation as there is only one Alpha who has had sex with Mario in the last two and a half years. During his last heat.

It is Marco's child that Mario is carrying under his heart.

Marco's child.

Just like Robert should have done three years ago. But that dream of his has long since died along with the life that was supposed to grow inside of him. And now Mario is the one who gets to bear Marco's children.

Robert isn't aware of having moved, but suddenly he has shoved the doctor to the side and his eyes have focused on Mario only. He has no idea what exactly it is that drives him to do this; if it is some strange Omega thing or if it is simply another Alpha thing that Robert seems to possess despite his nature. Maybe it is his love for Marco or even their bond that is making him do this, drowning out all rational thoughts and his conscious narrowing down to that one earth-shattering revelation.

Mario is carrying Marco's child. The child of Robert's Alpha. Of the man he so desperately wanted to become his mate. A dream that will never become reality for Robert.

He barely registers that Thomas is talking to him, trying to make him calm down. His eyes are still fixed on the completely shocked Omega in front of him before Robert lets out a deep warning growl and goes for him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so, so sorry that it has been so long since the last update. But now I feel ready to continue and hopefully finish this story.  
> This chapter is told from Mario's perspective and picks up right where the last one left off. The next one will either be from Thomas's or Marco's perspective, I haven't decided yet which one I will write first.

 

 

**Chapter 3**

 

Mario is unable to move, staring at Robert with wide eyes. The other Omega’s eyes are deep red when he charges, shoving the startled doctor aside and then tearing himself free from his mate’s arms. Mario only manages to instinctively raise his hands before Robert is right there in his face, one arm coming around the smaller man’s waist to keep him in place, the other grabbing the back of Mario’s hair.

He expected pain next when Robert pushes forward so hard that they lose their balance and tumble down to the floor, but there is none, Robert’s hand at his head keeping Mario from hitting his head on the hard floor.

Mario’s senses are overloaded by the feel of Robert’s body above his, his scent untypically dark and heavy for an Omega, not to mention the scary red eyes.

“It is his,” the Pole gets out through gritted teeth and he sounds haunted.

Mario stares up at him uncomprehending, his hand instinctively wandering to his own stomach. Robert is kneeling on all fours above him, not giving him any room to move away but leaving a few inches of space between their bellies. He shudders, eyes softening a bit before he repeats almost pained, “It is his.”

Mario has no idea what to make of that strange behavior, but he doesn’t dare to turn his eyes away. He can feel Thomas and the doctor watching them concerned, both of them at a loss of what to do because they are as afraid of upsetting Robert even further as Mario. He hears Thomas sending the doctor out of the room, perhaps hoping that it will calm Robert down a bit to be surrounded by people he is familiar with.

Meanwhile Mario figures that agreeing with the distressed Omega might be for the best. “Yes, it is Marco’s. Who else would it be?”

Robert whimpers and as though the sight of his glowing red eyes – usually reserved for Alphas having a rut – wasn’t unsettling enough already, they soften even more. One of Robert’s hands hesitantly touches Mario’s chest, making the younger man’s heartbeat speed up in fear when it slowly slides lower to his stomach. “Marco’s.” Robert sounds lost, vulnerable and dangerous at the same time and Mario flinches when all of a sudden Robert lowers his head to rub his facer against the other Omega’s stomach.

“Robert?” Mario asks worried and he looks helplessly over to the two men beside him. Thomas seems to have recovered from the shock and approaches them carefully, reaching out for his mate’s shoulder. “Robert, what are you doing?”

Robert lets out a low snarl and turns to glare at Thomas. “It is Marco’s!” His expression becomes almost adoring when he turns back to Mario’s belly and places a soft kiss on it. “It is ours.”

Mario meets Thomas’ gaze, both of them unable to make sense of those words and carefully the Alpha dares to protest. “Robert, this is Marco’s and Mario’s child, not yours.”

This time Robert’s growl is laced with fury and Mario as well as Thomas duck their heads at the dominance radiating from the older man when he insists, “It is ours!”

Once again he lowers his face down to Mario’s stomach, rubbing his cheek against and humming approvingly, right before he turns his face to the skin and starts to lick it.

Mario is not sure what shocks him more, Robert’s strange behavior or his own reaction to it. His hands instantly grab Robert’s hair to keep him in place and at the same time he feels a tug in his chest, a loud gasp escaping him at the unexpected arousal coursing through him.

He feels Thomas’ alarmed look on him and the Alpha tries again. “Robert, please, you’re not thinking straight. You are mated to me, remember?”

Robert freezes and he looks up at Thomas challengingly. “Marco is my Alpha.”

Mario has heard that a dozen times before as must have Thomas. But something is different this time. This time it doesn’t sound like an Omega stating that he belongs to an Alpha. No, instead Robert sounds like a possessive Alpha himself.

Thomas swallows, clearly afraid of Robert’s reaction when he says, “You’re right, he is your Alpha. But he is not your mate, I am.”

Robert frowns confused which makes Mario wonder what could have managed to throw the Omega so off that he would not recognize his own mate. 

“How can you be my mate when Marco is my Alpha?” Robert asks and there is no venom in his voice when he says that, genuinely irritated.

“Because I’m your Alpha as well,” Thomas responds and he raises his fingers to the mating bite on Robert’s throat, making the Omega shiver at the intimate touch.

It seems to distract Robert from Mario who straightens and instead leans to the side, trapping Thomas underneath him the same way he just did Mario.

“My Alpha,” Robert repeats and he sounds like he is trying the words on his tongue to find out how to make them sound right. He nudges his face against Thomas’ chin, tilting his head to the side and revealing the vulnerable curve of his throat where the red mating bite is. He frowns. “Your mating bite hasn’t healed.”

“It will fade with time,” Thomas reassures him. “It was much worse before we completed our bond, remember?”

Robert’s brow furrows as he tries hard to think, something that is rather hard when he is a slave of his own instincts at the moment. “I think I do.” His tongue darts out and he slowly drags it over Thomas’ throat to soothe the wound, making the younger whimper in both pain and pleasure. Suddenly Robert freezes though and he pulls back to look at the Alpha with an unreadable face. “Why can I smell Marco on you?”

Fear flashes across Thomas’s face and he quickly glances to Mario when he replies, “Because I slept with him only two days ago.”

The red in Robert’s eyes shifts, like a flame dancing in the wind and Mario has seen that expression a handful of times in Marco’s eyes. Robert – the real one, not the instinct-driven Alpha nature – is close under the surface.

“But how? We are mated and you are my Alpha.”

“He was having a rut and desperately needed to knot somebody. I was the only option.” Thomas sounds ashamed and Mario winces at the reminder of his own failure; the way he let Marco down and let Thomas pay the price.

But the confession changes something about Robert, the red finally making way for blue again and realization dawning in his eyes as he seems to remember everything.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers horrified and pulls Thomas up into his arms. “Thomas, I’m so sorry.” Then he turns to Mario with an apologetic look. “I have no idea what came over me. I just lost control and I’m sorry for scaring you like that.”

Mario relaxes a bit. “It’s alright. You didn’t try to hurt me, I know that. I just don’t understand what triggered your reaction. I have never seen anybody behave the way you just did.”

A dark expression entered Robert’s eyes and he bit his lip. “I’m not completely sure. And I don’t think I can talk about it right now.”

He gets back onto his feet and only does Mario notice that the other Omega is trembling. Thomas must have noticed it as well because when he stands up, he puts his arms around his mate again. “Robert, what’s wrong?”

Robert shakes his head, but he places a hand on his own stomach and his eyes fill with tears. He looks like he is short of having an emotional break down, his voice breaking. “Thomas, you don’t understand. You don’t know, nobody knows.”

Anxiety fills Mario when he realizes that it must be something really bad.

Thomas tightens his arms around his mate and looks at him intently. “Of course I know, Robert. You told me about it when I had my last rut.”

Mario looks between the two men, wondering what they are talking about. Robert tears himself free from Thomas’ embrace, shaking his head vehemently while the tears stream down his face. “No, you don’t understand! I was supposed to carry Marco’s child within me!” 

He is short of losing control again, prompting Thomas to raise his hands placatory. “I understand how hurt you must be. You have always wanted to have a child of your own and then to be robbed of the possibility is devastating. I know that you loved Marco deeply, but you were never obligated to do anything, least of all getting pregnant even if you and Marco had become mates. Who knows if you weren’t already infertile at that time.”

Somehow Mario has the feeling that Thomas completely missed the point. But he is too shocked by this revelation to ponder about it. 

“Hold on, what do you mean ‘infertile’?” 

It is Robert who answers him. “Because that’s what I am. I have been taking my suppressants for so long that I will never be able to get pregnant again.”

Mario stares at him shocked, waiting for Robert to take those words back. That can’t be true, can it? Suddenly Robert’s strange behavior is staring to make sense, why he would be envious of Mario.

“I didn’t know that, Robert,” he whispers and immediately he steps forward to pull him into his arms, hoping that the touch will help just a little bit.

Robert doesn’t move away, letting himself be held by Mario while Thomas watches them with one arm still placed at his mate’s lower back. 

They stay like that for several minutes and now that Mario’s mind is not railing any longer from the emotional rollercoaster of all these revelations, it truly begins to sink in that he is pregnant. At the moment he feels mostly numb, the shock still not really worn off.

For a long time Mario hadn’t want kids at all, he just hadn’t been able to think of himself as a doting father. But after he got together with Marco, his attitude had begun to change. They had talked about having kids a few months ago and Mario had been so surprised that Marco hadn’t been opposed to adopting children, the only option that meant Mario wouldn’t have to break off his football career.

And now Mario is pregnant…

He is still in a state of denial, the situation too unexpected and big to imagine. Their relationship has had enough problems already and they still are going separate ways at the moment and both of them are far from ready to have a child of their own now.

“I need to talk to Marco about this,” he says with a hollow voice. “Whether to keep the child or not.”

Robert’s body goes rigid and his embrace tightens while Thomas looks at Mario startled. “You're thinking about abortion?”

“I don't know yet,” Mario replies truthfully. “I never wanted to carry a child before my football career is over. I would lose at least a whole season and if I returned then, the child would have to be raised by someone else. Football isn't a part time job, if I wanted to spend my time with this child, then I would lose considerably more time than just one season.”

Thomas looks as torn as Mario feels, but Robert lets out a furious snarl and his arms link behind Mario's back, pressing their fronts closely together as though trapping the child between them would protect it. When Mario looks up, Robert's eyes are red once again. 

“You won't abort the child, Omega. I won't let you.” 

Mario can't turn his eyes away from Robert's intense gaze and he tries to argue that it will be his own and Marco's decision. But he can't. He is unable to say the words out loud and disappoint Robert further. He understands why this is getting to Robert so much and why he would never agree with a possible decision that could harm the tiny little life inside of Mario. 

“Let me first tell Marco that I'm pregnant. We can decide on the future later, alright?”

Robert doesn't look very satisfied with the compromise, but he gives a clipped nod though he doesn't loosen his hold in the slightest. Instead he stares down at Mario's stomach, too many emotions in his eyes to place them all.

“You're right, Marco needs to know first.” Then Robert drops to his knees and puts his cheek against Mario's stomach once more, staring up at Mario with a pleading expression that reminds the latter that he is not facing an Alpha but another Omega, something he has completely forgotten over the last few minutes.  
“Please, Mario, don't rush this decision. Tell Marco everything and then let that news sink in for a while. Otherwise you might regret it.”

Mario nods and tangles his fingers in Robert's soft dark hair, at a loss of what else to do to comfort the older man who is so clearly suffering.

Robert closes his eyes and he blindly reaches for Thomas' hand until the Alpha steps forward before adding softly, “It is ours.”

Mario meets Thomas' gaze, seeing the same kind of irritation looking back at him. What does Robert mean with that? Why is he repeating it like a mantra over and over again?

But neither of the two men can bring himself to ask Robert when he is kneeling on the floor with his face pressed against Mario's belly as though he could already feel the child in it.  Instead Thomas tightens his grip around Robert's hand while he takes another step closer, his free arm winding around Mario's waist and a joyful smile appearing on his face. “You may not want to hear it yet, but I'd still like to congratulate you, Mario. You're becoming a father after all.”

Mario chuckles. “Thank you, I guess. It still sounds so unreal to me. I think it will take a few days for me to process that.”

“We won't tell anybody about this until you feel ready,” Thomas responds. “Just take a few days off, otherwise our Alphas will go crazy again.”

Mario winces at the memory of all the chaos he created only a few hour ago. “Damn Alphas and your stupid instincts.”

This time Thomas is not the only who chuckles amusedly and Mario is sure he is not just imagining Robert pressing his face harder against Mario's stomach in a protective manner.

Mario doesn't call him out for it because his heart aches for Robert who will never get to have this possibility, never get to carry his and Thomas' child under his heart. 

But he can't shake off the feeling that he is still missing something important...


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back with the next chapter, this time from Marco's perspective.  
> I also have good and bad news for you. The bad news is that most of the chapters of this story will be shorter than the ones from 'Breathe Into Me' and 'Feel Your Echoes' (not this chapter, but most of the others). But the good news is that I have finished mapping out the details of this story and contrary to the first two parts it won't have eleven but twenty chapters. So I guess, it will still be have the same length when it comes to word count. :-)

 

 

 

**Chapter 4**

 

_The pained scream of his mate gets under Marco’s skin, his blood running cold as he watches Mario sinking down at the other end of the room, face contorted with pain._

_Marco’s instinct to protect his mate drowns out all rational thoughts and he lunges himself at the one who hurt his mate._

_Marco is barely aware of what’s happening as they both land a few hits before eventually going down onto the floor with a loud crash, Marco being on top._

_The Alpha shudders as he realizes that he is hurting Robert of all people, but he can’t bring himself to stop as he is driven by his need to protect his mate. Marco begins trembling violently as the grip on his throat tightens even more and he is slowly running out of air, but suddenly the grip loosens and without thinking Marco uses the opportunity to go for his opponent’s throat, his teeth breaking skin and sinking into the man underneath him._

_The moment that he hears the Omega’s howl of pain and he tastes Robert’s blood for the very first time in his life, fragments of memories some of which don’t completely belong to him surface from the deepest corner of his mind…_

… _The first one is his own, Marco feeling a wave of jealousy and possessiveness when he hears Robert talking about a future mate and without thinking he reverses their positions, pinning the Omega underneath him and reveling in the groan of pleasure he receives as he sinks deeper into Robert’s body. ”You’re mine, Robert. You’re mine to protect.”…_

… _Suddenly the scene shifts and he is lying in a different bed, this time on his back and staring up to the Alpha above him – an Alpha above him?! – as he leans up to gently lick over Thomas’ throat. He is still too dazed from his orgasm, every fiber of his being screaming at him that this is the one, his Alpha, his mate. Thomas is his mate. And he opens his mouth wider to accept this revelation and make the Alpha his forever._

“ _No!” Thomas cries out in shock right before he comes all over their stomachs. But Marco barely notices it as his teeth sink deep into Thomas, tasting blood and leave his claim on the Alpha…_

… _Marco is thrown into another memory, one that is definitely his own again. Once again Marco is the one on his back and Thomas above him, but there is nothing intimate about this situation. Thomas’ eyes are blazing with fury and when he speaks, his voice is nothing but a hiss. “He marked me, Alpha, not you! You will let him go!” The truth in these words hurt Marco, reminding him of the unwelcome thought that another Alpha has laid his claim on Robert; a claim that could make him lose Robert forever. He lets out a loud snarl. “I won’t let you take him away from me!” He is out of his mind with panic and his eyes drop to the mating mark. Marco knows that he can’t do anything to destroy it yet for some reason he can’t stop himself. Quickly he surges up and buries his teeth into the wound as deep as he can. Their surroundings disappear and Marco can’t see, hear or feel anything besides the Alpha above him. He grabs the younger man by his neck to pull him closer as he tastes the mingled smells of Thomas and Robert. If Marco was able to think coherently, he would have surely been shocked at the pleasure that he is feeling, pleasure that most likely originates from the traces of Robert he can taste and before Marco could have stopped himself, he swallows the mouth full of blood. The liquid burns down his throat and makes Marco feel lightheaded, unlike anything he has ever experienced. Just when he wants to bite down even harder, he is yanked out of this strange bliss and suddenly his front is being pressed hard against the ground and Robert is holding him down, reminding Marco why he was fighting with Thomas in the first place. “You have to stop.”_

“ _He claimed you,” Marco argues though the words sound completely wrong to him. Robert apparently thinks the same. “He took me,” the Omega points out. “I gave myself over to him, but he didn’t claim me. Or do you see a mating bite on my body?”…_

… _Marco is lying on a bed with Thomas above him again, another memory he can’t place. He feels like he is going to burst with the love he is feeling for the Alpha and he strokes Thomas’ face before whispering, “Please make me yours, Thomas. I’ve waited so long for you to finally lay your claim on me.”_

_Inwardly Marco freezes at his – no, Robert’s – words, but he can’t move, looking up to find Thomas smiling down at him lovingly. “You’ve already been mine when you marked me. No one else – me included - may have been able to see it, but I know now that from this moment on your heart belonged to me.”_

_Before Marco - or rather before Robert - can reply, the Alpha has leaned down to slowly lick over his pulse point. Marco groans at how good the intimate touch feels and the next moment Thomas has bitten down so hard that his teeth break the skin and Marco’s senses overload at the emotions pelting down on him. Within seconds Marco spirals down into darkness…_

 

Marco’s eyes snap open and he finds himself lying on his own bed drenched in sweat with the musky scent of his arousal in the air. The room is illuminated by the morning sun which completely disorientates him because he is caught in the foreign memory, the moment when Thomas and Robert completed their mating bond. A part of him wishes it was nothing but a meaningless dream, something his own mind made up in his sleep, but the images were much too vivid to be anything but real.

He turns onto his side, willing his erection to go away because his rut is coming to an end and he is in no mood to jerk off once again when he is feeling that miserable. But he can still smell Robert’s familiar sweet scent which is not very helpful in his current state. But what should really worry him is that this isn’t the only thing that fuels the fire in his veins and makes his cock stir. There is also the faint taste of blood in his mouth and even though it is not real but another effect of the memories, Marco can’t shake it off. One of his own memories supplied the delicious sweet taste of Robert’s blood when Marco hurt him during their ferocious fight to protect their mates. And Robert’s last memory of the mating supplied the thick and heavy taste of Thomas’ blood.

And no matter how hard Marco tries to deny it he can’t ignore how much the tastes are affecting him. Perhaps it is the fact that he is tasting the blood of not anyone but two bonded mates on his tongue, but the mix is toxic for his self-control. His arousal only grows and with a weak whine he gives up, wrapping one hand around his cock and stroking himself while he is burying his face in the pillow where he could swear he can still smell Mario’s scent of when they last made love two days ago. He whimpers at how painfully hard he is already and to his horror what makes his knot swell and sends him over the edge is a combination of all the wrong images.

Of thrusting into his beloved Mario’s wet heat while they kiss, of his lips swallowing Robert’s cry of pleasure when Marco hits his prostate and of stars exploding before his eyes when his knot stretched Thomas’ tight channel.

Marco comes with a loud sob, harder than he ever did since Mario left. His pleasure is mingled with guilt that threatens to choke him when he curls into himself afterwards, feeling like the worst Alpha in existence.

Why couldn’t he have just mated with Mario two and a half years ago and let Robert find happiness with Thomas?

It would have been perfect, all four of them would be happy. And instead his possessiveness destroyed everything. Now they are all suffering and to top it all Marco feels not only torn between his two Omegas but also attracted to another Alpha. An Alpha that Marco was so desperate for that he broke his dominant nature and knotted him.

Three years ago Marco swore that he would never hurt Robert and now he has not only done that but also hurt Mario and Thomas as well…

Carefully he gets up from the bed and walks into his bathroom, locking the door behind himself as though he can shut out his problems just like that. He takes forever in the shower, scrubbing at his skin to get the smell of his release off himself, but no matter how long he stands under the spray of water and how much shower gel he is using, the guilt and shame don’t fade. He feels drained when he eventually steps out of the shower and gets dressed to eat breakfast. His eyes are instantly drawn to the sleeping form on his couch and he heaves a sigh of relief at the sight. Erik has been caring for him in the last two days and also earlier this week when Thomas was still here and this is the first time that Marco has seen him sleeping. He walks over to the Beta and adjusts the thin blanket that has slipped down to his waist before walking into the kitchen and preparing breakfast for both of them.

Twenty minutes later a sleepy Erik sits down opposite him and eyes him carefully. “You look horrible, Marco.”

“And good morning to you too,” Marco says before adding in a more serious tone, “I

expected you to be gone by now.”

Erik takes his time with responding, first putting some food on his plate and taking a sip of his coffee. “You mean because of what you told me yesterday? That you had slept with Robert? I've already known that before I agreed to help you.”

Marco bites his lip. He has gone with Robert's lie because after what he did, he owes it to him and Thomas. Besides, it is a more believable excuse why Marco is feeling so miserable than Marco having slept with another Alpha.

“Robert and Thomas are mated. And I love Mario. How could I do this to any of them.”

“You had a rut that could have killed you,” Erik argues intently. “No one is blaming you when there was no way you could have prevented this. You held the inevitable off for longer than we all anticipated. They all know that too, otherwise Mario wouldn't have come to help you right after you slept with Robert.”

“I miss him,” Marco admits in a low whisper, his throat feeling too tight all of a sudden. “I want him back so badly. I want to be with him every day and night and to tell him how much he means to me.”

Erik looks at him for a long moment. “What about Robert?”

“He wouldn't want to see me,” Marco replies and his eyes sting from the unshed tears he is trying hard to hold back. “You have seen his shoulder. I hurt him. After promising him time and again that I wouldn't let any harm come to him, I was the one who hurt him. He won't forgive me for that.” _And for hurting his mate like I did._

He barely registers that Erik has rounded the table until the Beta is crouching down beside him, looking up at him. “Robert is stronger than you think. If there is anyone, he would forgive then it is you. Why else would he still be calling me thrice a day and ask how you are doing?”

That news takes Marco by surprise. “He did?”

“Still does,” Erik replies with a soft smile. “You know, I don't really understand what is really going on between Robert and you, but I can see that he still cares about you very much. And don't you think I couldn't hear you moaning his name in your sleep.” Marco freezes in horror, but Erik isn't finished yet. “You still love him. And just because you both love somebody else who you chose as your mate doesn't mean this thing between the two of you is over. This involves all for of you and you need to figure this out together.”

“What are you trying to say?” Marco asks warily, unsure what to make of the words from the far too attentive Beta.

“Before Thomas entered the picture, you and Robert have been staying away from each other for Mario's sake. But time and distance haven't affected your love for each other in the slightest. And the last two days you have been dreaming of your two Omegas as well as Thomas, crying out their names and jerking off to it.” Marco's blood runs cold at that, but once again Erik has more to say. “I'm not dumb, Marco. You desire them. All three of them. And I know that you love your two Omega. I don't understand how Thomas fits into this, but that's your business. All I know is that staying away from them is only making it worse.”

“I'm not going to betray Mario again,” Marco replies instantly with an angered growl.

Erik shivers but he doesn't turn his gaze away like he is supposed to. “That's not what I was asking you to do. But it may be a good start to apologize to Robert and Thomas in person. Thomas is a mess from what I could tell in the hospital. Sharing his Omega with another Alpha must have hit him pretty hard.”

Guilt washes over Marco again. Erik is right, Thomas must be devastated and insecure even if it is from different reasons than the Beta is suspecting. “You are right, I should apologize to them. I owe them that much.”

 

***

 

Marco has been contemplating if he should drive to Mats' place and visit Mario first. Because Mario is his mate. But Marco has not hurt him in the way he has the other two men and he would do better to try fixing that damage first. It is Robert who opens the door and Marco's body is trembling from how much effort it takes him not to fall onto his knees and beg the older man for forgiveness. For hurting his mate and then him. The fresh bandage on his shoulder visible at Robert's collar only makes it worse.

“Marco?” Robert sounds surprised rather than angry. “What are you doing here?”

“I need to apologize,” Marco replies and he sounds so small all of a sudden. “To both of you. Thomas was doing all he could to help me and I should have never made him submit to me. And I hurt you as well.”

Robert looks at him for a long moment, but there is not rejection but a strange rawness to his eyes before he steps aside to let Marco in. The Alpha does, but no sooner has he stepped over the threshold than Robert has flung himself into his arms.

The force of it makes Marco stumble backwards and his senses are overloaded by Robert's familiar scent surrounding him, tinged with ointment and old blood from the wound on his shoulder.

“I'm sorry, Robert,” he whispers and this time he doesn't care about the tears falling. “I don't know what has got into me.”

“It's alright,” Robert replies and he sounds like he is crying too. “You were fighting for your mate just like I was. There is nothing for me to forgive.”

They hold each other for several long minutes and Marco has the urge to lick the wound to soothe it, but since he can't do that with the bandages, he has gone to licking the Omega's throat, careful to stay away from Thomas' mark and respect the other Alpha's claim. It takes him a while to take not of another scent, one that is familiar as well but lighter than Marco remembers. He finds Thomas standing in the doorway and watching them quietly. He doesn't look like he minds Marco embracing his mate in such an intimate way, but he he looks wary.

Slowly Marco pulls away from Robert and takes a hesitant step towards the other Alpha; guilt, shame, gratitude and want filling him. “I'm sorry, Thomas. You were helping me through my rut and I should have never forced myself on you. I should have never asked this of you.”

“It was my decision to let you take me,” Thomas responds and though he sounds sure of his words, there is still a trembling in his voice. “You didn't force me to do anything. I thought I could take it, but I was wrong.”

Before Marco can respond, Robert has rounded him and reached out for Thomas. “Take my hand.” The Alpha frowns but obeys and lets his mate pull him forward. Robert has turned back to Marco with an unreadable expression. “Neither of us is blaming you for what happened. But you made my Alpha submit to you and it will take time for him to deal with the aftermath.”

He looks at Thomas who takes another step forward until he is standing right in front of Marco. The blond Alpha is overcome by the urge to raise his hand and touch Thomas' face, but he forces himself to stay still and wait.

A part of him is fearing that Thomas will demand the same kind of submission from him and knot Marco as well, but instead Thomas pulls at the hand still entangled with Robert's until the Omega is in his arms. Marco frowns in confusion, wondering how this could help Thomas get his confidence back, but a moment later Robert tilts his head to the side, looking straight into Marco's eyes while Thomas' mouth closes over his mating mark and he bites down.

Marco whines low in his throat when he sees Thomas showing his claim on Marco's first Omega, hears Robert's gasp of pleasure and smells his arousal while Thomas is swallowing the little sips of blood. A moment later Robert's eyes close, momentarily setting Marco free but only to mirror his mate's actions and bite down over Thomas' still not fully healed mark as well.

It is a show or rather a test. Whether Marco is able to accept that neither of these two belong to him and it is harder to stay quiet than it should be. Marco has known for a while now that they are mates, so why does it hurt so much to stand there and watch them mark each other again?

He hasn't realized how badly he is shaking until the two let go of each other's throats and with one hand still wrapped round the other, they reach out for him and pull him into their arms.

“Shh, Marco,” Robert whispers into his hair soothingly and after a while the shaking subsides and Marco allows himself to relax against Robert's chest, feeling lightheaded at all the blood surrounding him. A moment later he feels Thomas' warm voice whispering into his ear.

“All is forgiven, Marco.”

He sighs in relief, but when he watches the two mates sharing a short kiss before they tighten their arms around him, he feels longing.

For his own mate whom he loves from the bottom of his heart.

But also for the Alpha and the Omega in front of him who have both wormed their way into his heart as well. But Marco doesn't understand how he can feel this way about three people and so he doesn't say anything, instead he takes comfort in their touches while his heart is yearning for his mate.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to wait with the new chapter until I have got more reviews for the previous one(s), but unfortunately I've been sick since yesterday and my body and soul decided they need this chapter as medicine, so here I am with the new one. :)
> 
> It might take up to two weeks until I will be able to update because I will take a few days to get back onto my feet, then I will write a request I have received from somebody very dear to me and only then will I be able to continue with this story.
> 
> Please, if there is even just a little bit of this chapter/story that you liked, please leave some feedback. I really need it right now and there is nothing more disheartening than continuing a complex that nobody but one or two people are interested in.

 

 

**Chapter 5**

 

After a while the three men stumble into the living room, each of them unwilling to let go of each other just yet. Thomas is aware that whatever this is between them, it is rapidly getting out hand. He and Robert only wanted to accept Marco’s apology, but the moment Thomas buried his teeth in his mate’s throat, it got out of control. The two of them marking each other again is an intimate thing not meant for anybody else to see, sending waves of pleasure through their bodies as well as their bond. Yet they allowed Marco to stay. That alone is not normal.

What makes it even worse is that Marco is clearly affected by this and it is not only the expected jealousy. The Alpha has buried his face against Robert’s chest, desperately fighting against the arousal he is feeling while Robert and Thomas are consuming each other in their kiss. But then he turns his head, latching his mouth against Thomas’ throat right where his mating bite is and starts to suck.

Thomas groans at the pleasure he is feeling spreading through his body, a part of him wondering why neither he nor Robert mind that Marco is touching this very special spot. Instead Thomas tilts his head back to give the other Alpha better access and his hands grip Marco’s hips to steady himself while the latter is repeatedly dragging his tongue over the abused skin. Thomas gasps and his cock stirs underneath the denim, but at the same time he tenses at the memory of what happened the last time that he got intimate with the Alpha. 

He hears a growl from behind Marco and suddenly Robert has closed his jaw around the Alpha’s neck, his eyes sparkling a dangerous red. The sight only arouses Thomas further, but he doesn’t move and only watches silently as Marco lets out a whimper before letting go of Thomas. It reminds the younger Alpha of that time Robert held Marco down in a very similar situation, both times defying all rules of dominance and submission in order to protect his mate.

And Marco seems to like getting subdued almost as much as Thomas does because instead of trying to break free, he drops onto all fours, Robert who is still clinging to his neck, getting pulled onto his back.

The sight of an Alpha  _submitting_ to an Omega is so unbelievable that Thomas completely forgets about his anxiousness and he watches in fascination as Robert starts to grind his hips against Marco causing the younger man to start moaning and he moves back against Robert to meet his movements.

Thomas feels a wave of jealousy, not because what is happening between Marco and Robert but because he wishes he was in Marco’s place and got dominated by his mate. Marco’s cock is visibly tenting his jeans and he moans louder when Robert’s hands stroke down his sides.

“Do you like that?” Robert whispers into the blond’s ear, his eyes trained firmly on Thomas. 

“Yes, more!” Marco replies in a husky voice that sends shivers down Thomas’ spine and he winces in sympathy when Robert stops abruptly and bites Marco’s neck just firm enough to make it hurt. “Did you just command me?”

“Please, Robert,” Marco begs. “I need more, I need you.”

“That’s better,” Robert replies and he rocks his hips against Marco’s backside, his hands sliding over the Alpha’s stomach towards where the latter so clearly needs it the most.

And there he stops.

Marco whines unhappily and tries to move his ass back again, but Robert releases him and takes a step away from him, uttering the single most important word. “Mario.”

Marco freezes, his hands balling to fists to fight against the fog of lust in his mind. “I need to talk with him about this. This whole thing between all of us is getting out of hand. I wasn’t supposed to feel this level of attraction towards both of you.” 

Robert nods. “Yes, you should go to him. Trust me I have the suspicion your conversation will change things anyway.”

Marco frowns in confusion, but doesn’t ask further. With one last glance he walks back to the door where he turns to Robert once again. “You did this on purpose, didn’t you? Subduing me and making me beg. Why?”

Thomas stares at him in surprise, wondering what reason Robert could have for doing that. His mate gives Marco an apologetic but not regretful look. “I could feel Thomas’ growing fear when you became more demanding. He thinks he is not a proper Alpha for his desire to get dominated by someone else than his mate and I wanted to show him that there is nothing wrong about it, even for an Alpha.”

That is the last thing Thomas expected to hear. He curiously awaits Marco’s reaction and to his surprise the other Alpha doesn’t look the least bit upset. Instead a little smile curls at the corner of his mouth. “You’re a wonderful mate, Robert. Thomas is lucky to have you by his side.” He doesn’t wait for a response as he slips out of the door and Thomas stares after him, wondering if Mario will tell Marco about the pregnancy. 

But then his attention is drawn to his mate. As soon as Marco is gone, Robert lets out a pained gasp and he sinks to his knees, arms put protectively around himself.

“Robert?” Thomas asks alarmed and he surges forward, grabbing the older man by his shoulders. “What’s wrong?”

But Robert only shakes his head vehemently and the red glint is back in his eyes along with the same haunted expression he has shown when they found out about Mario’s pregnancy. “Why do I still want him, Thomas? I have got you now and he has Mario, why can’t we all be happy now?”

“You have loved him for years,” Thomas explains patiently. “And not to forget the two of you are bonded in your own special way. You can’t just cut that connection like that.”

Robert stills all of a sudden and it scares Thomas even more. “The bond. Perhaps the child is the reason.”

Thomas waits for him to explain his cryptic words, but Robert has fallen silent now.

“Robert, your bond with Marco was there long before Mario became pregnant.”

He freezes when Robert raises his head and looks at him with wide eyes. “I’m sorry, Thomas.”

“For what?” the younger man asks confused. 

But instead of a reply Robert leans up towards him and captures his lips in a hard kiss. Thomas lets out a muffled sound of surprise but instantly parts his lips, allowing his mate to take charge. He can feel desperation in the kiss but also pain and hurt that is not directed at him. With great effort he pulls back and whispers, “What do you need, Robert? What do you need to feel better?”

Robert opens his eyes, revealing the war of red and blue and them. “I need to help you. In whatever way I can.” 

Thomas hesitates, but there is only thing he wants right now. “I want to feel you. Please.”

He has no idea if that is a good idea considering they’re both not exactly in a healthy state of mind, but he needs to feel his mate, especially now that Robert has Marco’s scent on him. 

His mind goes blank when his lips are once again sealed by those of his mate who walks him backwards into the direction of the stairs. “I love you, Thomas,” he whispers every time they break apart to catch their breaths and the words make Thomas shiver while the Omega’s hands are roaming over his sides. By the time they have made it to their bedroom, they are both naked, aroused and most importantly covered in small bite marks. Thomas lets himself fall back onto the covers, pulling Robert down with him while they are both sucking at their renewed mating bites.

After a moment Robert lets go and gives him a confused look. “Your bite smells of Marco.”

Thomas chuckles at his irritated tone while the memory of Marco sucking at his neck resurfaces. “So do you.”

Robert grins amusedly and just like that the desperation and anxiousness has faded a bit, both of them kissing each other gentler now. The smell of Robert’s slick fills the room, arousing Thomas even more but he tenses as he is reminded of what they truly are. That he is supposed to be the dominant Alpha and Robert the submissive Omega.

“What’s wrong?” Robert asks softly.

“I know it sounds ridiculous, but for a moment I forgot what we are. I have become so used to you being the more dominant and secure one in the past few days.”

Robert smiles at him reassuringly. “You don’t have to be the dominant one all the time, Thomas. You may be an Alpha, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t like submitting every now and then. Let’s forget about people’s prejudices and be who we want to be.” He leans down, his lips hovering over Thomas’ own when he adds, “You want to feel me inside of you, don’t you?”

Thomas nods, surprised by his own wish. “I do. But I’m afraid.”

Robert’s eyes turn entirely red, the sight of an Alpha lost in his instincts. His voice is still gentle though. “You don’t have to be, love. I don’t have a knot, remember? It won’t hurt, I promise.”

Thomas feels a smile tugging at his lips. “You don’t have to do that. I know how uncomfortable Omegas are with dominating their Alphas.”

“You’re right, they don’t,” Robert replies while he slides his hand down Thomas’ chest torturously slow. “But I thought we had already settled that I would be your Alpha as long as you need me to be.”

“I can’t ask that from you,” Thomas argues.

“You can ask everything of me,” Robert replies and Thomas why every single word out of his mate’s mouth sounds like a love declaration. “And it’s not something I _have_ to do. If it helps you, then this is something I will gladly do. As long as you are sure that it is something that you truly want.”

Thomas hesitates for only the tiniest moment, but the mere thought of feeling his beloved mate inside of him makes his insides curl with desire. “Claim me, Robert. Please.”

And a moment later their lips meet once again and this time he isn’t the one granting Robert control but the latter demanding it himself. He slides his tongue into the younger one’s cavern, exploring it greedily while Thomas surrenders to him.

His gasp when Robert’s hand ghosts along his cock and then starts to massage his balls, is swallowed by his mate’s mouth.

Never before has Thomas been more aware of Robert’s physical strength as now that he is at the latter’s complete mercy, the fingers teasing his entrance undoing him just like he hoped they would.

Robert releases his mouth and opens his glowing red eyes. “Relax, Thomas.”

The younger man tries to, a part of him wondering why Robert is taking so long with starting to prepare him, but when the fingers return and he feels the first one slipping into him, he understands. 

“Fuck!” he cries out at how easily the tip of Robert’s index finger slides into him and how pleasant it feels. “How did you-?”

He breaks off when he sees Robert pulling back his second hand and a few seconds later placing it against Thomas’ ass. They are coated in slick.

Thomas is so stunned that he can only watch in silence as Robert sits back and slips the index finger of his second hand into him, sending a pleasant tingle through his body. “Did you really just use your slick as lube?”

“I don’t know where this is coming from,” Robert replies and he sounds truly clueless. “I just felt very…”

“Possessive?” Thomas supplies and they both chuckle at how strange but also right this situation is.

Robert takes such an awful long time with stretching his hole with only those two fingers that Thomas is convinced he is going to die from arousal before Robert has even claimed him.

“Robert, please, I’m ready!” he keeps begging like a mantra, but his mate ignores his pleas, retracting one hand every now and then to coat them in more slick again. Which is not a good thing because it only adds to Thomas’ arousal and his cock is rock-hard by now. “Robert, you’re killing me!”

But his mate, the devil that he is, continues taking his time, adding a third finger that slips in easily with how stretched Thomas’ hole is by now. Thomas groans and moves back to take more of Robert’s fingers in, slowly starting to fuck himself on them while Robert watches his face with a fond smile. “You’re mine, Thomas. And you will feel that when I claim you.”

The promise makes Thomas shiver again and he is barely aware of a fourth finger joining the previous three, only of his mate’s beautiful face above his own as he leans down to kiss him. “Please, I need you inside of me!”

He whines when Robert retracts his fingers, leaving him feeling empty and aching to be finally get filled by his Alpha. “Please!” 

He stills and holds his breath in anticipation when Robert grabs his thighs and pushes up to his shoulders, the tip of his cock resting lightly at Thomas’ entrance. There he waits until Thomas’ eyes focus on his, the two mates locking gazes before he finally sinks into Thomas.

The younger man tenses at the feeling of Robert’s cock burying itself deeper into him, but it is not painful just like his mate has promised. 

“Feeling alright, love?” Robert asks him and Thomas can only nod, too caught up in the experience to form words any longer. And when Robert starts to move, he cannot help but moan in pleasure, feeling his Alpha’s cock thrusting into him with increasing force. The last shreds of his composure crumble when Robert drops one hand and wraps it around his cock to stoke him. “Please, Alpha!” he whimpers, having no idea if he is begging his lover to stop because the sensations are too much or he is begging him to continue and help him find his release.

“Come for me, Thomas,” Robert whispers and as though his words were a command, Thomas bucks up, wincing at the feel of his walls clenching around Robert’s cock and his own knot swelling under his mate’s fingers before he finally shoots his load over the latter’s hand and their stomachs.

The force of his orgasm is so hard that it takes a while until Thomas becomes aware of his surroundings again, but when he does, he notices that Robert hasn’t come yet and he isn’t moving. Instead he is looking down at Thomas with a soft smile, his body tense from how much effort it takes him to hold himself back.

Thomas frowns. “Why did you stop?”

“I want you to feel every tiny little detail when I claim you. I want you to feel it when I come inside of you and you to realize that it won’t hurt at all.”

Thomas feels his heart swell with love for his mate and that he is holding on to his promise even now that passion is ruling him. He raises his hand to stroke along Robert’s cheek, wondering not for the first time what he has done that would make him deserve such a strong and beautiful mate. “It’s time, Alpha. Make me yours now.”

Robert growls and he leans down to place his mouth over the freshly renewed mating bite. He begins thrusting into his mate’s body again and after his orgasm Thomas is even more aware of how amazing it feels, with his mate hitting that sweet spot inside of him that makes Thomas cry out in pleasure.

Robert gives him no time to get used to it, instead he hits with every snap of hips and Thomas is screaming at him to stop and to go on at the same time, his awareness narrowing down to that special spot and Robert slamming into him. 

He is so distracted by it that Robert crying out the moment he comes inside of him, takes him by total surprise. He feels his lover’s release inside of him, his claim, but it isn’t painful. Just like his Alpha promised him to.

Thomas clutches his mate tightly to his chest as they lay on the bed and he doesn’t realize that he has started crying until Robert tilts his head and carefully pulls out of him, worried blue eyes scanning his face. “Thomas, why are you crying? Did I hurt you?”

“No,” Thomas replies in a croaked voice and he smiles before placing a little kiss to his mate’s cheek. “I’m just so happy. That you love me so much.”

“You deserve every love I have in my heart,” Robert tells him and all of a sudden he sounds sad. And Thomas knows why, knows that Robert feels guilty that a part of his heart still belongs to Marco.

“Don’t say that, Robert. Marco deserves a place in your heart as well. You wouldn’t be the amazing Omega you are now if it wasn’t for his love. And I’m sure he will always love you even now that he has another mate and a child on the way.”

Robert tenses at his words and he tightens his arms around Thomas. “There is something I need to tell you, Thomas. Something about Marco and me that you don’t know yet. Not even Marco himself.”

Thomas can sense his fear and instinctively he brushes the sensitive mating bite on Robert’s throat to soothe him. “What is it?”

But Robert shakes his head and he lays down beside Thomas, hiding his face in the crook of the younger man’s neck. “Tomorrow. This night was about our love and I don’t want to let the ghosts of my pasts tarnish a memory I will cherish forever.”

Thomas nods before closing his eyes as well and falling asleep in the strong arms of his mate.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very sorry for being so late again, the last weeks have been very eventful.  
> I contemplated for a very long which chapter to write first, the one with Robert's confession or the one where Marco finds out he is going to be a father. I eventually decided on the former because I didn't want to squeeze it somewhere between all those "happy pregnancy chapters", that would have felt very weird and out of place. Still, this chapter turned out a lot less dramatic - no, that's not the right word, perhaps a lot less dark? - than I previously expected.  
> Thomas is definitely my new hero here.

 

 

 

**Chapter 6**

 

The morning after Robert is the one to wake first. He blinks a few times to focus, feeling the warmth of his still sleeping mate seeping into him. Thomas is clinging to him in his sleep, his face pressed against Robert’s chest and giving him not much room to move. When Robert catches sight of the various red marks covering Thomas’ upper body, the events of last night are slowly returning to him.

A little smile tugs at his lips at the memory of what they did, how they managed to make their already complicated relationship even weirder. They have reversed their roles with Thomas becoming the Omega and Robert his Alpha. It may be only temporary, but it is still something out of the ordinary and Robert has never heard of a couple who has done that before. But Thomas so clearly needs his mate to step up now and so Robert doesn’t regret what they are doing even if everybody else would most likely disagree. And contrary to most Omegas Robert has never had a problem with being a bit dominant, it just has taken on a whole new level now.

Robert’s eyes travel to the most prominent mark on Thomas’ body, the large mating bite at the side of his throat. It looks horrible. For some reason no one seems to understand the wound has never healed completely and of course Robert has deepened it several times before. It is natural instinct for a mate to deepen the mark during sex, but obviously that has only made it worse. Not only is the wound still open, the skin around it is also an angry red. Thomas must be in constant pain and the realization makes Robert’s insides clench. 

He leans down and breathes in the scent clinging to the bite which is mostly his own with just a hint of Marco still hidden underneath. It reminds Robert of the promise he made to his mate last night, that he would tell him about the one dark secret he had been keeping inside of him for months. The one thing he has not even told Marco even though the Alpha had every right to know about this. The memory is still painful even though he has had a lot of time to deal with the devastating news, but the reason why his heart is beating so fast is fear. Fear of Thomas’s reaction.

It is one thing to know that your Omega still has feelings for his first Alpha, the one he wanted to mate once. Robert would have understood if Thomas hadn’t been able to accept that. And now the younger man will find out that the only child his mate has ever carried inside of him – and the only one he will have ever carried in his entire life – was Marco’s…

Robert tries to shove the thought away and he gently licks over the mating bite, the action calming him for some reason. He feels Thomas stirring slightly, a happy sigh escaping him and though he is still asleep he unconsciously tilts his head to the side, giving Robert better access to the intimate spot.

Robert pulls his body tighter against his chest, parting his lips above the mark and sucking at it which draws a strangled moan from his Alpha. Thomas’s eyes finally flutter open and he turns in Robert’s arms until they are facing each other. “Morning,” he yawns with a soft, content smile and the sight makes Robert momentarily forget about his growing fear. “Morning, love,” he replies before capturing his mate’s lips between his own, kissing him lazily. He doesn’t want this perfect moment to ever end, reveling in the feeling of having his wonderful mate in his arms and feeling him through their bond that seems to brim with love every time they touch.

Robert has barely been aware of how much he is taking charge, not until Thomas pushes lightly against his chest to break their kiss. It is only then that Robert notices that he has rolled on top of his Alpha and is trapping him underneath his own body. Thomas doesn’t look like he minds the slightest, his composure still relaxed, but there’s worry in his eyes. “What’s wrong, Robert? What are you afraid of?”

Of course Thomas has taken note of this. Robert swallows around the lump forming in his throat and forces a reassuring smile onto his face. “Let’s get dressed first. I will tell you during breakfast.”

He rolls to the side and gets up from the bed, feeling his mate’s confused gaze following him while he is heading for the bathroom. As soon as he can’t smell his mate any longer, the fear is back full-force and no matter how hard he tries, he can’t calm down again. 

An hour later when they are done with breakfast, he sits down on the couch in their living room, still clutching his cup of coffee to give his hands something to do while Thomas sits down beside him, his worry pulsing through their mating bond. The Alpha doesn’t say anything, patiently waiting until Robert has composed himself enough to start speaking.

Robert has wrecked his brain for the past hour, wondering how to start but truth to be told, there is no ‘right’ start here. All he can do is being honest and hoping for a miracle.

He reaches out with one hand, relieved when Thomas doesn’t hesitate to take his hand and squeeze his fingers reassuringly, giving Robert the needed strength to speak out loud what he has never told another soul.

“You already know parts of this story. Earlier this year I felt sick and decided to visit a doctor. He told me that my body was trying to go into heat but couldn’t because I have been taking suppressants for too long.” Thomas stiffens and he looks confused that Robert is addressing this matter again. Robert bites his lip and forces himself to continue. “He said I could never get pregnant again.” This time Thomas shuffles closer, tightening his grip around Robert’s hand. “I already know that, you don’t have to tell me again. I know how hard this is for you, but it doesn’t make a difference to me. You’re still my mate, no matter if you can get pregnant or not.” 

Robert shakes his head and he is shaking so bad now that he has to put down his cup of coffee. “I know that you love me despite what I have done to my body, but you only know half of the story.” He meets Thomas’s worried gaze again. “And I fear you may change your mind after I have told you the rest.”

“I won’t,” Thomas argues instantly and the conviction in his voice breaks Robert’s heart. “Nothing you will tell me could change the way I feel about you.”

“I did worse than ruin my own body by taking the suppressants,” Robert admits and waits for a moment, savoring the softness in his mate’s eyes and the reassurance Thomas is sending through their bond, because it will most likely turn into something completely else in a few seconds.

“I was pregnant.”

It is deadly silent for a moment before Thomas frowns, obviously wondering if he has misheard Robert. “You were pregnant?” he repeats disbelievingly.

Robert nods and forces himself to explain despite the pain clawing at his heart. “I have been taking my suppressants for six years now and until a few months ago they only failed once, three years ago. That’s how Marco found out I was an Omega. You already know that he helped me through my heat, but what you don’t know is that there were consequences.”

Thomas is staring at him with wide eyes, shock replacing his disbelief. “Marco impregnated you?” When Robert nods, he adds, “But that can’t be possible. I mean you never took a break from playing football, there is no way you could have been pregnant without anybody noticing it. The Alphas would have been all over you, the team doctors would have noticed it in your fitness results. And Marco. He loves you, he would have never left you if you had been carrying his child. He would have mated you, he…” Thomas takes a shaky breath. “Someone would have known. You can’t have been pregnant, Robert.”

“Yet I was,” Robert says and he doesn’t even try to fight against the burning tears in his eyes. “The sole reason for me going into heat despite taking suppressants was to let an Alpha knock me up. My body was so desperate for me to stop denying my nature that even one time would have most likely been enough. And Marco stayed with me during my entire heat, so you can imagine that he took me a lot more often than just one time.”

His words send a shiver down Thomas’s spine and there is raw pain in his eyes though Robert isn’t sure whether it is caused by the knowledge that Robert was pregnant with Marco’s child or the mention of his mate and another Alpha having sex. Thomas doesn’t move, his scent changing slightly to the one of an Alpha in distress while he is trying to digest the news.

In a low voice Robert adds, “It never occurred to me that I could be pregnant. And so when Marco and I had a fight and told me that he never intended to make me his mate, I resumed taking my suppressants.” His voice breaks at those words and he starts to sob uncontrollably. “I killed it, Thomas. I killed our child.”

Instinctively Robert places his hand on his stomach, grieving for his unborn child once again. He flinches when Thomas grabs his wrist and pulls it away from his abdomen. Robert blinks against the fog of tears in his eyes and he notices only now that Thomas’s eyes are a deep shade of red, not the burning eyes of an Alpha having a rut but the crimson eyes of an Alpha needing to comfort his mate. 

“You didn’t kill it, Robert. There was no way you could have known that you were pregnant.”

But Robert barely registers his words while all the emotions he has already gone through half a year ago, return to his mind again. There is pain, so much pain and heartache, but mostly he feels disgusted with himself. “I’m an Omega, I should give life, not take it away.”

Thomas moves immediately, cupping Robert’s face between his palms and forcing his mate to look at him. “Stop it, Robert! You’re only hurting yourself with that way of thinking!”

“But it’s true,” Robert argues and he has trouble breathing all of a sudden, the hate he is feeling for himself for what he has done, making his throat tighten. “What kind of Omega am I when I kill my own child? What kind of Omega am I when I ruined my body so much that I can never get pregnant again? And what kind of mate am I when I love another Alpha?” He turns his face in an attempt to free himself from Thomas’s grip, but the younger man doesn’t loosen his hold, making Robert whimper before he adds, “I don’t deserve you, Thomas. I know you love me despite everything I did, but I could see the hurt in your eyes when I rejected you after finding out about Mario’s pregnancy. And you have every right to be hurt by my actions. You are my one and only mate, the person I have dedicated my future to yet I keep falling back into the abyss of my past.” He closes his eyes, unable to look at Thomas any longer. “You should send me away for good and find somebody who can make you happy. Someone who-”

He doesn’t get to say more because all of a sudden he finds himself lying on his back with his Alpha staring down at him, eyes a fiery red and a threatening growl escaping his threat. “That’s enough, Omega! I won’t allow anybody to insult my mate, not even my mate himself.”

Robert tries to throw him off, but he is still too upset after all the crying to do more than writhe and buck underneath the taller man’s body. “I’m not worthy of being your mate!” he shouts at the Alpha and when Thomas lets out a snarl before leaning down towards him, Robert expects the Alpha to hurt him, a brief flash of fear coursing through his entire being when a memory flashes up before his eyes; of the last time many years ago that he had been shouting at an Alpha holding him down…

Before the memory can truly materialize though, Thomas’s lips are enclosing the skin  of his throat and his teeth dig hard into Robert's flesh.

The Omega howls with pain, but at the same time the claws of self-hatred which have been tearing at his heart loosen their baneful grip and the threads of their mating bond engulf Robert's heart, letting Thomas's love start to heal its deep wounds.

Robert gives up his struggle then, slumping underneath his Alpha's body and suddenly he is not crying because of his lost child or hurting his mate but an entirely different reason. 

“Please stop loving me so much, Thomas!” he begs the younger man, the tears falling freely from his eyes now. “I can't take it, it's too much. My heart is not big enough for all the love you feel for me.”

Thomas lets go of the abused skin and his expression softens when he meets his lover's eyes. “You are my mate, Robert, and without you, my life would be meaningless. I will never send you away.” A small, reassuring smile appears on his face before he raises his hand to wipe a teardrop from Robert's cheek. “You will learn to deal with all this love that I'm feeling for you.  My love for you knows no bounds, Robert, it only gets stronger with each passing day. And I know now that your love for me keeps getting stronger as well and I would like to thank you for that.”

He leans down again, but this time to place a soft kiss against Robert's lips. The Omega returns it and he feels their bond pulsing with feelings.

“I just told you I was pregnant with another Alpha's child,” Robert reminds his mate with a sad voice. “I know this has been long before we got together, but the thought must still hurt you.”

Thomas takes his time with answering, but when he does there is nothing but honesty in his eyes. “What hurts me is that you lost your child. It doesn't matter who the father was, this was  _your_ child and you are my mate now, so that makes it my child as well. You are right, what you have just told me has hurt me deeply. It has hurt me because we would have been parents by now but the cruelty of life has robbed us of this possibility.”

Robert stares at him for a long moment before asking in low voice, “You mean you would have accepted this child as your own?”

“I love you,” Thomas replies as though that explains everything. “All I would have been able to see in it was you. So yes, if Marco hadn't mated you, I would have done it despite knowing that I'm not the biological father.”

This time it is Robert who feels like he is going to burst from all the love he is feeling for his mate and he pulls Thomas's face down to kiss him, laying all his feelings in that kiss and sending them through their bond as there are no words to describe how much he loves his mate.

They are kissing each other for a very long time, each touch of lips against skin erasing some of the pain this conversation has left inside their hearts.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave comments and/or kudos - feedback is love and keeps me motivated. :)


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